STRONG LANGUAGE... I DONT LIKE " THE NOTEBOOK"

The Notebook… is sacred ground. I realize this. I know. I am about to send so MANY of my friends into spasmodic fits of satanic proportions. Because while I DO love SOME of the quotes from the movie… and there are some beautiful ones… umm

I hate this movie. Yes, I HATE The Notebook.

First and foremost let’s cut to the chase. It actually sends an incredibly bad message to men about love. Essentially it says you cannot ever love a woman enough and she will ultimately drive you fucking insane because of that love.

Guys.. .if that is your situation... .WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH? JUST SAYIN!!!!

Noah… climbed a ferris wheel to get Allie to go on a date with him… WHILE SHE WAS ON A DATE WITH ANOTHER MAN. Let’s look at this shall we? First, Noah, threatens to KILL himself RIGHT THERE if she doesn’t go out with him. Her date, shoulda kicked him. Frankly, all romantic moments were theoretically the property of the DUDE BUYING THE TICKETS FOR THE RIDES!!!! You are out with him! SUICIDE is NEVER romantic. The movie lost me pretty much RIGHT there.  She’s trolling for men while on a date.. RUDE! He is CLEARLY mentally unstable… somehow… score? Imma pass on the fucking wackjob threatening suicide over a DATE cause God ONLY knows wtf he is gonna do when the check comes ON the date!

Windsor Mansion- oooooooooh yes let me into your dream baby. Who cares if the ceilings are unstable…. And have brittle wood… that can BURST INTO FLAMES! Ah romance.

Noah is so much in Allie because ya know… a whopping summer… that he is supposedly her “true love”. No baby…. That’s just your FIRST love. She gets good at drinking and livin her rich lil life with her rich lil fiancée who is quite unaware that Mizz Thang isn’t so happy.

The blank canvas. OH YES… I know… undying desire for a future with Allie. REALLY??? GET THE FUCK ON WITH YOUR LIFE AND FIND SOMEONE TO BE HAPPY WITH!!! Seriously… this is like annoying beyond redemption to me. First, hello fiction? Even DISNEY is scratching their head going “whoa so far fetched” cause lets be real…NOT! Second are you telling me somehow it is utterly romantic to waste your life pining for a person that DOES NOT WANT YOU in the HOPES that they do? I understand what it is like to love someone that does not love you. LIVE YOUR FRIGGIN LIFE! Besides it was ONE DAMN SUMMER! ONE! AS KIDS! No jobs, no real life shit… gimme a break.

Geese are never romantic….ever.

Allie’s fiancé is the shiznizzle. He is perfect and rich and sweet and kind and tolerant and devoted and HOLLA the RING to PROVE his love… and what does she do? She makes a very clear decision to cheat on him. WHOO HOO SCRUPLES! Yep…slammed up against the cupboard and ravished. Is that supposed to be hot passion cause it looked a lot more like desperation from not getting any secondary to impersonating an Amish dude and holding out for Allie for a looooooooong time.

Pining relentlessly and destroying any possibility of a healthy normal life for the sake of a woman who lives life in the fast lane, goes to school, lives off her family fortune….. has NO contact with NOAH for like a looooooong time… and he KEEPS A ROOM FOR HER… hello ABDUCTOR/STALKER/GONE INSANE BE BACK LATER ringing any bells?

Reverse the roles in the movie for a second. If it were the chick being so detrimental to her life and it was the guy having her life…. If the guy left his very perfect and sweet fiancée to go be with someone he knew FOR A FEW MONTHS…devastating the other woman… and moves to the house with the girl that has been psychotically waiting for him….. would we even be having a conversation? NO!! She would be the psycho chick that like was insane and why on EARTH is he indulging this?? Then again... Kinda. That movie is called GREY GARDENS and we KNOW what happened to THOSE chicks!

I believe in true love and I believe in real love. NOBODY has to tell ME what it is like to lose that cause I did TWICE. NOBODY has to tell me the pain. But to dedicate your life… to someone.... in that manner… on the SHOT that they MAY come back… WHILE… they are out doing THEIR thing? Are you kidding me? How about… IF they COME BACK…you have both had fulfilling life experiences and relationships that maybe didn’t quite meet what you had together but you have GROWN and are going to go forward? How about ALLIE was MONUMENTALLY unfair to her fiancé by saying YES when apparently all it took was a suicidal dude to come back in her life.

Like I said.. I love the quotes from this movie. But suicidal wackjobs making shrines are not really good life partners... are they?